Being Outdoors vs. Being 'Outdoorsy'

Someone asked me if I was 'outdoorsy' type of person a while back, and I wasn't sure how to respond because I don't know all the connotations that term is meant to imply. And I don't really like labels that categorize me as one type of person or another.

But this week, I did something that was really glorious...it was so simple, yet it made me feel youthful and fully in the moment, outdoors.

My son attended a Lego camp at a local university, which is about half an hour drive away in the middle of the day and last for three hours. A dear friend lives in this town but we weren't able to connect on the first day of the camp, So there I was, three hours to kill in a small university town where nearly everything, including the local coffee shop, (bummer!) was closed for summer holidays.

So, I took my trusty Hello Kitty and trade picnic blankets, which are always in back of the car, spread them out under a nice shade tree, grabbed my knitting, and had a most pleasant afternoon in the summer air, at one point even taking a nap!

Working on a pair of matching hats for twin girls coming in October! 

It seems such a small thing but how often do we, as adults, enjoy simple time outside without boating on lakes, swimming in beaches, or driving for hours to find mountains to climb? How often do we just spread a blanket on the ground outside in the shade and simply relax?

Though it is mid-summer here, on this day I was blessed with overcast sky and a breeze which made temps feel cooler. In the South, summer is often the great exodus from outdoors, especially during midday, due to the heat. Busy towns look like ghost towns between noon and 5pm. So I was pretty much on my own, minus a bit of occasional traffic passing by, but that was okay too.

My view!

I have spent time in Europe and lived in the North, and there I always saw people spread out blankets enjoying outside time in pleasant weather, not doing anything more strenuous than perhaps tossing a frisbee on a nice afternoon. Parks and university lawns and public places would be dotted with color as people found and took their places with picnic baskets and toys for small children who might be present. I think maybe here in the South we take pleasant weather for granted a bit, especially in summer when a cool day randomly inserts itself in the midst of almost triple-digit temps. Had my friend been free that afternoon, or the coffee shop been open, I might not have enjoyed this time outside, either!

Outside time doesn't have to be grand or involve doing 'outdoorsy' things (which I think means boating, hiking, swimming, etc.) But fresh air and time out-of-doors is good for mind, body and soul. I don't believe one needs to necessarily drive many miles to enjoy time outside in nature - my hours on the university grounds were rejuvenating and restful, and such a simple thing to accomplish, and something I can do anytime in my own neighborhood when weather allows.

So the next pleasant day, when you have a few hours to spare, spread a blanket on the ground, grab a good book or fun project and a bottle of water, and enjoy some outside time. You don't have to break a sweat, I promise!

A Short Story of Burnout and a Free EGuide from Saimaalife.com

A few years ago, something happened to me that I never imagined. It took a while for me to put it into terms. I felt at times I was drifting away from myself, and my core identity was being rocked. At first I kept it to myself, but after a while, I had to talk about it because I needed to understand what was happening.

And finally, I did. After years of burning the midnight oil, working a full-time job while also passionately pursuing a second career, of pushing myself always to be doing more, I had hit that rock bottom affectionately known as burnout.

Whereas I once was involved in a flurry of projects and activities that thrilled me but took an immense amount of energy, suddenly, I was solely focused on raising my child and working and taking care of my home...and very little else. Weekends became a new vibe. Netflix became my best friend.

Here is the thing I've learned about burnout - it redirects you. You don't just get your mojo back suddenly and leap back into the foray. You burnout for a variety of reasons - you are careening at breakneck speed down a wrong path, you have expended beyond a normal amount of energy, or what you want and need from life simply changes cold turkey on you and you suddenly find yourself not knowing what to do with yourself anymore. The dreams you were driving yourself towards just seem to die a slow, painful death.

The death of a dream is akin to a relationship abruptly ending. All the attention you gave it, all the time you spent with it, how it factored into your long range plans...burnout takes that away and you have to start fresh. Going back to the dream is like going back to an ex over and over...the pieces usually just can't be picked back up.

This is where depression can settle in, because not knowing what to do with one's self can lead to a sense of idleness and lack of purpose. Of simply going through the motions without really feeling life. The dream gave a great deal of purpose and suddenly it isn't there anymore. When you've been passionately pursuing a dream for a long time, the regular motions of life can feel a bit to, well...regular.

So you think. A lot. And you start realizing that the dream, the quest, the ambitions that lead to your burnout actually took up a hell of a lot of your time. You hadn't noticed how much before, but now you were finding great joys in being out in nature, in knitting and creating functional items for your home and family, in trying new recipes, finding a perfect bouquet for the dinner table from your own garden. You find a great deal of joy in a long, long walk in nature, coffee with friends, and perfecting your homemade pie crust.

You are still the same creative person, the same ambitious soul, still driven and high energy to do many things....they just aren't the same things anymore. Your soul wants - and needs - something now that is no longer related to the dream. And you suddenly find a great deal of happiness coming from just being, and just being you.

My friend Mari of SaimaaLife worded it best when she said, "For a long time I pursued a life that I thought I wanted; success, a better salary etc. My burnout led me to question my life choices up to this point. In nature’s silence I realized that the things that I really wanted were elsewhere. I also realized that they had very little to do with fame and money."  In her new, free E-Guide From Stress to Relaxation: 10 Ways to Wellbeing With the Help of Nature, Mari address the similar experiences I had over the past few years and not only how to combat them, but when it's also wise to embrace them. To listen. To understand what your soul and body are telling you. What it's wise to hold on to, and what it's wise to release. A guide towards both a more authentic life and a more authentic you. You can download the free E-Guide here or by visiting SaimaaLife.com.

Please feel free to comment on the eGuide or share your own experiences with burnout! I'm going to dedicated a few posts in the coming weeks to both recognizing burnout and using it as a fuel to reboot your life! Until then, Happy Friday. We are 6 days away from a 12 day spring vacation over here, and can not wait!

Welcoming 2016 and the Amnesia of Middle Age :-)

Going into 2016, I feel kind of sort of like a mess...or as we say here in the South, a 'hot mess,' but that's okay. The end of 2015 was fraught with trials and complications of unprecedented proportions. I operated a lot on auto-pilot. Life as I knew it was buffering, frozen in place, and I was going through the motions as I waited for it to pick back up and continue on as normal.

It was like sleepwalking. For months. But somewhere, in the midst of what seemed to be never-ending chaos, I found something. Something I had lost.

“You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.” 

― Friedrich Nietzsche

We can lose a lot in our never-ending quest for things to remain normal, primarily because normal is an illusion. It is also a habit, and habits are addictive. In the midst of all the trials brought on by the end of 2015, I found myself over and over just wishing things were 'back to normal.' 

“Chaos was the law of nature; Order was the dream of man.” 
― Henry Adams, The Education of Henry Adams

What I discovered as I picked up the pieces of my life was lost long before 2015. It was lost when I tried to make a doomed-from-the-start love affair work by molding myself into what I thought someone else wanted. It was lost when I tried to find happiness in things as they were instead of changing what I knew in my heart I didn't enjoy. It was lost when I tried too hard to do too much that, while good and worthy, wasn't what I authentically wanted to be doing with my time. 

Somewhere, in the midst of all the rubble I sorted through, and all the renovations I watched unfold, and all the subsequent scares I endured, I snapped out of what American journalist, novelist, essayist, editor and educator Peter Hamill refers to in his introduction Janet Beller's  Street People, one of my favorite photojournalism books, as 'the amnesia of middle age." 

And I remembered. I remembered who I am, which is a very different person from who someone else wanted me to be. I remembered striving to change things instead of just trying to be happy with them the way they were. I remembered what I authentically want to do with this one and only life. 

And so, as 2016 quietly rolled in, I curled up in bed and read, while fireworks illuminated the skies all around me. Because the book I had was really amazing, and reading was what I wanted to be doing in that moment. 

Living fully can look different ways for different people, but I don't believe it looks like habits that lull us into a false sense of security, or clinging to that sense of security because it's normal. And I certainly don't believe living fully can take place if one is inauthentically living. 

I do, however, believe in the amnesia of middle age, and will be careful not to slip into it again! The wake up call is a bit much! :-)

Happy 2016 to you and yours from the boy and I!

Hard Life Lessons from (or for?) an Elder Artist, pt. 2

***In order to protect the privacy of V the artist, no photos will be used in this series of blog posts***

In Hard Life Lessons from (or for?) an Elder Artist, pt.1, I introduced my readers to V the artist and her difficult situation.

It hasn't changed. The more I speak with V, the more I question the motives she uses in order to, in the catch phrase of our era, achieve her dream. Recently, she told me the story of receiving a phone call from a mega-celebrity after tracking down his mother in a California nursing home. He was polite, but not amused at this invasion of privacy and also not interested in taking ownership of V's artwork, which had been her primary focus...finding a celebrity who would take ownership of she and her late husband's life's work, create an exhibition space/gallery for it, and also fund the publication of a memoir book and possible movie/documentary about their lives.

Dispersing the work is not an option, nor is selling it. V wants her moment in the spotlight, the accolades she feels she deserves for spending a lifetime in front of a canvas, brush in hand. She's completely unwilling to yield here. I was initially so concerned about her quality of life and how to help her that I didn't see the truth behind the reason she contacted me.

She didn't want friendship, companionship, or someone to help her sort out things and find a better living situation. She wanted someone to help her track down private addresses of the rich and famous in hopes that she could achieve fame and wealth by grabbing onto their coattails. If they took an interest in the art, in other words, they would promote it, and her. And this was not a new idea. V and her late husband had been doing this for years; she has celebrity addresses going back at least a decade. 

As much as I want to help V, I can't get on board with this particular plan. Most artists I know accomplish what they work for by working for it - showing art at every opportunity, promoting themselves, doing whatever it takes to get their work visible to others, usually all while raising families and/or working part-time/full-time jobs. They are certainly not trying to skip all of the above steps and achieve greatness through a celebrity's name. And let's not forget the 5-figure price tags that clearly show V is not interested in common folk having her pieces; only the wealthy could afford these kind of prices for art, which has resulted in a lifetime of paintings and drawings stored in file cabinets and closets.

I have come to believe that art stored in closets and file cabinets because high price tags aren't being met is somehow wrong. Art is for everyone. Every home should contain pieces of original artwork. Art should be a part of everyday life, not something persons can only see in museums, high-ticket items available for purchase only to a select, elite few. 

In V's world, artists are a small, distinct group, placed high on pedestals, celebrated for their vision and interpretations of the world around us. But I don't live in that world, not anymore. I was headed there at one time, but then I realized it was a fast track to making my art less accessible to the people who really seemed to love it, who would value it in their homes and lives. It would result in my art being stored in file cabinets and closets, which is not what I want.

And so, from years of growing as an artist and a person, and my recent re-connection with V, Art is for Everyone was born. This Facebook page serves to promote the art of myself, and hopefully in time, others, not to make us famous or wealthy but to get our creations out of the studio and into the world. I'm very excited about seeing what happens, and hope you'll follow along!

And stay tuned for updates on V. She has now shifted her focus from celebrities to the top 200 American Art Collectors. I have more hope that this might bear fruit, though she recently told me she would die with all of her paintings before she'd split the collection up. I'm not sure even the most enthusiastic collector wants 50 paintings by the same artists. So we'll see how it goes...

Ritual, Festival and Rhythm

Last weekend here in America, we celebrated Independence Day. I think it's a fair assumption to say that this is probably our biggest holiday of the year next to Christmas. What does this celebration look like? Fireworks, festivals, time with family and friends, good food, wearing lots of red, white and blue...

Boys and trucks...what is the fascination?

These celebrations tend to be the same across the country, and they don't really change much from year to year. I've attended the same small town festival each July 4th for as long as I can remember. In the past, I might have lauded this as an exceedingly dull way to spend a holiday, citing a need for adventure and questioning doing something again that I've already done once, or multiple times, before.

And as our annual trip to the Isle of Palms approaches, I'm reminded of a commercial I saw recently stating that 85% of Americans, when traveling, go to the same places they've been before. The commercial presented this as a negative, implying 85% of the population lack the gumption to try  someplace new. I'm inclined, however, to disagree with that logic.

I believe it's the ritual of attending a place that draws us back time and time again. For my son and I, our trip to IOP each August marks the end of our summer. It's a sacred, special time, and because we've visited there so often, has now become our home-away-from-home. Going there is a given; something we know we can rely on. And while we do travel to other places (a trip to Colonial Williamsburg is being tossed about at the moment!) I always budget an August week at IOP into our summer travel plans.

I'm sure I've used this pic on the blog before, but it's so sweet I can't resist using it again.

Ritual is rhythm, and rhythm is important. Whether the ritual is big - like a yearly sojourn to the coast - or small - like rising early for my morning yoga practice followed by coffee on the patio - it becomes a source of strength. In The Spiritual Tasks of the Homemaker, Manfred Schimdt-Brabant states, "Nature determines the rhythmic forming of time sequences. Nature takes the human being through the seasons....for by rhythmically repeating an activity, one creates a kind of platform in the etheric element...and one day will be able to throw one's glance into the spiritual world from this place." In other words, "Rhythm is strength."

Festivals and festival/feast days often mark the seasons, too. Most of the festivals we attend locally are centered around spring, summer, autumn and the Christmas holidays, following the rhythms of nature and faith. But what I find more important are the small rituals we practice daily and/or weekly in the home, such as weekend bread baking...

Rising...

Jewish Braided Challah Bread, my son's favorite!

...or seasonal rituals, such as summer corn-shucking parties...

Your resident blogger, preparing all that homegrown, organic corn for safekeeping...

Ritual is rhythm, and rhythm is strength. Just as we look to the sky for the first scurry of leaves that signal Autumn's chill will soon be in the air, we can look to our own daily, monthly and yearly rhythms to find the flow and balance within our family life. It sets the tone, and in an unpredictable world, gives a sense of safety and security.While monotony can become dull, rhythm, when understood, becomes an essential part of well-being in the home and daily life.

I'll be finishing up part two of the post Hard Lessons from (or for?) an Elder Artist sometime this week, and following up today's topic with a post titled The Rhythm - and yes, the Joy - of Housekeeping. Now it's time to go start on some Challah bread. Because we are primarily vegan, I can only make this when I've had a delivery of eggs from my friends who keep flocks of happy hens!

Recommended reading on today's topic:

The Spiritual Tasks of the Homemaker by Manfred Schimdt-Brabant

Almost Amish; One Woman's Quest for a Slower, Simpler, More Sustainable Life by Nancy Sleeth

A Nostalgic Almanac by Edna Hong

Wednesday Photo Essay One Day Late!

Last Wednesday evening, tragedy rocked one of my favorite and most frequented cities - Historic Charleston, SC. 

It's been a long, emotional week for most of us here. Hearts are heavy.

It's also been exceedingly hot. Each day my phone has buzzed several times with special weather statements basically warning everyone not to spend more than a few minutes outdoors during peak hours when heat is the highest. I have coffee and study on the patio each morning then I'm basically indoors until late evening.There's plenty to do inside, but I'm a bit jealous of my Northern friends who are making the most of warm summer temperatures and spending pleasant days outside enjoying the sun. And I'm jealous of anyone who needs a sweater in the evenings in June. That's my kind of climate, warm in afternoons but sweaters needed in morning and evenings!

However, I've managed a bit of time outdoors, working in the garden, long evening walks, visiting the pool, and enjoying our beloved woods, which are always shady and cool! Here are a few images from the week!

A neighborhood kitty! Love this guy and how he strolls around like a boss!

On Father's Day, I prepared all the sides and two desserts, including a Kentucky Butter cake, which is hardly vegan but becoming a much-requested item from my family members! You can find the recipe here. Isn't it lovely? I love about anything I can make in my bundt pan!

My contributions to the Father's Day family feast, loaded up and ready to go!

And I apologize in advance to all of my feminist sisters, but on these long, miserably hot days, I'm quite content being barefoot in the kitchen! This berry pie is a fan favorite here in my household, though I'm still mastering the art of the perfect homemade pie crust! I learned to make this five years ago when I spent the summer with friends in Finland. Every time I get homesick for Scandinavia, which is pretty often, I whip up one of these! I await the day I can buy frozen Ligonberries in the US...until then, it's blueberries, strawberries, and/or raspberries, or in the case of this particular pie, all of the above!

And while we're in the kitchen, I'll end this post with a simple pleasure - I was thrilled to find these lovely white eggplants imported from Holland at a local market. I'd never seen a white eggplant before and I can't wait to make chips out of this guy later tonight!

I hope you can forgive the not-so-nature-centered photos in this post. Now, I think I need to go downstairs, where there are four children playing hide-and-seek and being a bit too quiet! See you Sunday!

~Amy

Wednesday Photo Essay + A Visit to Sans Souci Community Garden

Most of my mornings start like this...

Which is perfectly okay! Only a few more weeks and I'm done...at least until September! Rising early to it all done before the day begins works for me, and also allows for a bit of time outside before the extreme heat of Southern summer kicks in. I call it the eight-to-six rule, meaning from about eight in the morning until six in the evening, it's not very pleasant to be outdoors.

This doesn't mean we don't make the effort, though! Here are a few images from this week's explorations!

"Always be on the lookout for the presence of wonder." 

- E.B. White

And a walk about the garden earlier this week proved to be delightful! Tiny tomatoes, bell peppers and spaghetti squash. I am never without the belief that it's all utterly amazing, a miracle.

And lastly, a wonderful visit to the Sans Souci Community Garden in Greenville. This garden has been a tremendous source of inspiration to me for many years, and I was thrilled to be able to finally see it in person.

I was also thrilled to visit the Haywood Mall while in Greenville, but we won't discuss that!

I hope you are enjoying these photo essay mini-posts! You can follow Sans Souci Community Garden on Facebook, and I recommend dropping by if you live in or near the area. Lots of awesome stuff happening there!

Now we're heading off for some skating fun! See you Sunday!

~Amy

Wednesday Photo Essays - a mini post plan

After last week's unintended blog break, I promised to return with a post on raising happy minimalists - in other words, a child or children who find more joy in moments and experiences than things. And that post is coming over the weekend; it's a subject near and dear to my heart. In the meantime, I'm sharing a few photos from yesterday's post-summer-storm-deluge stroll with a friend around the grounds where I live. It's no secret what I'm in search of on these walks....

...mushrooms!

I don't know why or when or how I became so obsessed with fungi, but my phone is filled with images like this. I think they are so magical! This little mushroom village in the above picture was almost too much for me to stand......then I found this wee red-capped one. Oh my golly gosh!

Then we came across the twins here...

And this little guy at the base of the big oak tree...

Nature is so fascinating and amazing, and I love photographing it. I feel so grateful that there is no need to drive to another area, town, or state to do this; there is breathtaking beauty right outside my front door. Each Wednesday this summer, I plan to do a mini-post showcasing some of the natural beauty that we are surrounded by, including wild beauty, which I believe sometimes is the best of all.

My friend and I rounded out our mushroom-hunting stroll yesterday evening with a stop by the garden to pick a fresh spring bouquet for the kitchen table (the produce is from our local farmer's market; it will be a few more weeks before we can harvest our eggplant and sweet potatoes!)

Even though this is an indoor shot, I'm counting it as a nature photo and throwing it into the mix! I'll be back next Wednesday with more nature photos, and I'll try and keep the mushrooms to a minimum! Look for my post on children and minimalism Sunday!

Happy Wednesday all, and thanks for stopping by!

Amy

Spring Give-A-Way!!!

I spent this Mother's Day morning gathering dandelion blossoms and wildflower bouquets with my son in a nearby meadow while a pair of hawks circled overhead.

Pure bliss.

I'm using the dandelion blossoms for some experiments with natural dyes and the wildflower bouquets, well, we just love them. Spring was late arriving in the South this year but she has finally sprung and it's been a lovely season.We can feel the pending steady heat of summer in the air some days, but the cool mornings and evenings of spring are still holding fast.

In honor of spring, I am hosting another Give-A-Way! My Autumn Equinox Giveaway was such a fun success that I can't wait to see how this one goes! What's up for grabs? A signed 11x14 limited edition print of one of my most popular works, She Walks Two Worlds.

This is one a piece with a lot of history and personal meaning! It was featured on Susun Weed's Share the Talking Stick in 2011 and was the title piece in my 2012 solo show, She Walks Two Worlds: Exploration of Eco-Feminism. Winners will receive this print along with a few other goodies. It's easy to enter! Simply

• Follow my blog by email
• Share this post on Facebook, Twitter, or any other social media feeds
• Follow Pan Pan Studios on Facebook, Twitter and/or Instagram (@PanPanStudios)
• Comment below to let me know you've entered! Find this image and accompanying post on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and comment there also for extra chances to win!

I will choose a winner at random Sunday, May 17! That's a week to participate, so have fun! Remember shipping is free worldwide! 

I hope you are enjoying spring in your corner of the world as much as we are here! I've so much fun and exciting things to share with you in the coming weeks! 

Have a great week,
~Amy~

Rewild Your Life April Challenge: Update and Pics

At the beginning of the month, I joined up with the awesome folks over at We Are Wildness for the April thirty day Rewild Your Life Challenge! (For more information on this, visit my post from March 28)

For my son and I, this wasn't too difficult of a challenge as we spend a lot of time outdoors in nature. We're blessed to live right beside a wooded area with trails, a large creek, and nearby ponds. Wildlife is abundant, which is a good thing...for the most part!

We have not only been able to spend plenty of time in our garden, where I was crowned queen...

but we've also been out in the woods...

...and we were even able to spend a lot of time each day out in nature when we visited the coast for Easter weekend!

Here are a few more pictures from our rewilding adventures! I'll be honest, this week it's been a bit challenging with all the April rains, but we've managed!

I love mossy trails!

April showers bring mushrooms everywhere!

So. Much. Love. 

When my friend's family bought this land about 80 years ago, this post was there!

Nature in the city - an old Southern yard on my parent's street!

Beauty along the way

The junkyard dog and I!

Surveying his domain...

Are you participating in the April 2015 Rewild Your Life Challenge? If not, it isn't too late to join! Sign up here and rewild your life today!  P.S. you can follow on Facebook for more rewilding tips!